Friday, July 30, 2010

So, that's that, then?

It's been a big day for a rather drab and otherwise un-noteworthy 12 hours.  Two things happened today.

The first is that Mike passed, er failed?, his second sperm test.  He's shooting blanks.  The surgery was a complete success and our child bearing years are behind us.  It was rather fitting that the "sample collection" included a morning romp with Evie pounding on the door to their bedroom and Layla screaming like someone was beating her.  How very romantic.

For as significant as that phone call was with the news that it was over, I feel at peace with the decision.  No more babies.  No more birth control.  The IUD comes out on Monday.  I wonder if my body has any idea how to manage those hormones on it's own.

The other piece of news is that Evie did not nurse today.  Not once.  She's been down to nursing just once or twice a day for a while now.  This morning we had a bit of a rushed start, with the whole "sample collection" and children worked into a starving frenzy by the time I let them out of their room.  That's not all that unusual, and honestly it's been more frequent than not, as of late.  But she didn't ask  before bed.  And as I lay her down, I was all too aware of the fact that she didn't ask.  And I was choosing not to offer.  And so we begin the weaning process.  I know it's not over, but it's the beginning of the end.  And while I'm a bit sad, I'm pleased that we're doing it on our terms.  On her terms.

So as of today, we are sterile and slowly shriveling and drying up.

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