Monday, July 27, 2009

thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's MINIVAN?

Oh April. April, April, April. What have you become?

I want a minivan. Not just want one, but envy my friend that has the most Suzie Homemaker minivan I've ever seen. Dude, it has automatic sliding doors, a TV and DVD player. I wants it. I must have it. I will have it. And have it, I shall.

Okay, probably not, but I can fantasize.

I would own it and embrace the stereotypical elements of the moment. I would put on my best high waisted, camel toe producing mom Capri's that I could find. Pair it with a nice holiday cardigan, ankle socks folded neatly over, with highly functional and well supported tennis shoes. My hair would have at least two cutesy barrettes and I would be rocking my most blown out, support less bra to complete the look. And as a final touch, a scrunched up Kleenex shoved up my sleeve.

And I would giggle. And ask all about the turner thingy and make it go thingamajiggy. And I would be happy.

But, alas, this is not in the cards for a very long time. So I wait. And covet. And plot.

1 comment:

  1. A camel-toed woman has been seen breaking into minivans only to sit in them and giggle while rubbing her face on the steering wheel. She is not dangerous, but should not be approached. Wads of tissue usually left at scene. Film at 11.