Puke. Everywhere.

Oh hello stomach flu, nice to see you. Thank you for freaking me the fuck out enough to run my infant daughter to the pediatrician and being twice as bad as the swine flu that blew through here last week.

Evie seems to be past the puking, at least she hasn't in 24 hours, but naturally the shits have begun. I'm still puking, but Layla and Mike are fine for now. But there was literally puke everywhere. Our bed, the living room, my chair, between my tits, which, by the way, seems to be her target area for aiming.

I hate the stomach flu. And I hate cleaning up puke. I don't mind my kids puking ON me cause I can just hop in the shower, but getting puke out of carpet, bedding, and mattresses is a bitch.

So if you ever see me running towards my kid while in the midst of a hurl, only to attempt to catch it with whatever I'm wearing, you'll know why.