Thursday, August 20, 2009

I almost beat my child on the Coastal Trail tonight

Cause she sucks.

Big Time.

I am not even kidding that Layla worked my last fucking nerve on our walk tonight. I was totally feeling it tonight. I had slow cooked the beef roast over night for beef veggie soup. Cut up the veggies, covered in water and put in the fridge. This morning I popped the roast, pieced up, in with the veggies, seasoned and left instructions for Mike to start it when he got home.

I know, I know. You don't give a shit, but it sets up the fact that I didn't have any prep or cooking to do tonight. AND I didn't have to work late tonight. So I decided to take the girls for a good walk on the trail, instead of our crappy 3 mile loop around our neighborhood.

It didn't matter that I took the time to pick fresh raspberries and pop popcorn for the devil spawn, she was going to suck. I had to put up with screaming, whining, yelling, begging, kicking, squirming, continuous snack trading, porta potty breaks at every turn, more whining, and finally full on tantrum. By the time we hit tantrumdom, we were minutes from the car and at the busiest part of the trail.

I think I would have left her ass in some rose bushes if nobody was looking, but alas, I was under the ever watchful eye of those who believe that they are/were perfect parents. It still ended in a spanking, but I didn't throw her in the lagoon.

I swear to god that I think she is fucking insane at times. This child. THIS child, may break me.


  1. Never, April. You're way too strong to break.

  2. I am so there, and it is a big reason why B is still an only child!