Thursday, January 21, 2010

I hate Mike's birthday

Over 17 years, Mike's birthday has morphed from a great day, to a birthday weekend extravaganza, and on to something off the charts.

It does not matter what day of the week it falls on. It doesn't matter what age he is turning, or what present I get him. He just keeps upping the ante. This year includes a full 3 days of celebration, a specific fancy bakery cake, his gift, and of course, sex. Creative sex. And I'm already tired. How exhausting.

I hate his birthday. I hate that for a full month leading up to it, I have to hear "so, what do you have planned for my birthday". I hate attempting to pick a gift for him, only to have it returned, rejected, or not used. This year I managed to avoid that by giving him cash. How romantic.

So, as I enter the eve, of the eve, of the eve before his big day, please keep me in your thoughts. It doesn't help that he likes to rub in the fact that getting older for men means something very different than it does for women. And how my eggs and ovaries are shrivelling up.

At this rate, my children are going to grow up believing that we celebrate their birthday the entire month of March.


  1. Happy Birthday, Mike! I hope April gets you a new puppy, another guitar and a big bag of multi-flavor Jelly Bellies! You deserve it, Buddy! :)

  2. Kevin is the same way. Drives me nuts. His birthday is in the beginning of December and he claims Christmas ruins his birthday "month." MY birthday is closer to Christmas than his is.