Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Do I really need a play by play of your "doo doo"?

Layla is getting this whole 'potty on the toy-yet' down. She no longer has to pace and panic, but she has developed another weird quirk.

She is a doo doo exhibitionist.

"Mama? You sit down and watch me doo doo"?
"Sure, honey".

And then starts the play by play that would impress even Harry Caray. It always starts with an exaggerated grunt and all of the following is said in that strained voice of someone over pushing.

"Mama, I push the doo doo out".
"OOOOOOO, mama, the doo doo is stuck"!
"Can you hear it? I hear it? Look tween legs, can you see it"?

And on and on and on until she is finally done. Then we have to do the ritual wipe, viewing of the doo doo, flush, wave good-bye, and one mighty "BYE BYE DOO DOO"!

Why is so much of being a mom shit related?

1 comment:

  1. my favorite poop conversation went like this:

    "Oh mama, it (poop) looks like a woodpecker"

    [Mama is trying not to laugh hysterically and forever scar the son, who hates woodpeckers. Or worse yet, scare the kid back into diapers. And how the fuck could a turd look like a woodpecker. Wait - don't answer that - I don't want to know. Suffice it to say, it looked like a turd not a bird.]

    "What's wrong mama? You no like woodpeckers? Don't worry mama!"

    I commenced laughing so hard that I cried. Thankfully he is still pooping on the potty.